Over at the lovely Artisanal Craft Blog, our good friend Dave was discussing how it’s really and truly not a good idea to 1) continue to comment on something your lawyer has told you that you really shouldn’t and 2) to use violent imagery in an apophasis towards someone. Despite using a metric ton of context, someone still had an issue with it. The problem? Why, the very first letter of the alphabet.
Yes, dear zombie readers. Bill Schmalfeldt has his metaphorical panties in a twist over the word “A.” Apparently not realizing that it is COMPLETELY CORRECT to characterize a singular something as “A Something,” Bill has to insist that that little “A” be both changed and added to, transforming it into a “MY.” As if that would COMPLETELY change the entire meaning of what was said and makes it so EGREGIOUS that a correction MUST BE MADE!!!!11!!1! ZOMG!
What a delightful little contretemps he has made for himself. Quibbling over a little “A.” Nothing could be more humiliating than insisting that just that – out of ALL the entire article Dave wrote – is incorrect.
But you have to ask yourself why oh why would anyone decide to make a fool of themselves on the Internet over a single letter?
The answer? Control. More precisely, the need to have control over things.
Bill Schmalfeldt doesn’t like what people are doing – repeating and quoting him back accurately and then commenting on it. My proof for this? Can be found in Bill’s very next comment:
Somebody doesn’t understand either the legal definition of a word and what it is all about in a legal context or the reason behind my newest daily feature. Somebody doesn’t like people doing things that he doesn’t want them to do.
Bill Schmalfeldt wants to control how he looks to people. Perhaps Bill Schmalfeldt shouldn’t have said all those things that he did in the manner that he said them. Perhaps he shouldn’t have photoshopped a woman unknown to him as riding on a giant penis as “punishment” for something that she didn’t do. Then he might actually look like a normal person to people who didn’t have the visual proof of his own words and deeds on the Internet in front of them.
Instead we are left with the vision of Bill Schmalfeldt that HE has presented to the world at large.
He doesn’t like that very much.