Jealousy is Such an Unbecoming Color

I was not shocked to see a tweet from Bill Schmalfeldt earlier today whining about attention being paid to Lee Stranahan.

Neither was I surprised to see that he still lusts after Lee in a sexual manner. (Bill really needs to get out of that closet! It’s OK! It’s 2017! It’s a good time to be gay!)

But, what I WAS surprised to see was that a few hours later, Bill is whining that his complaints about Lee just weren’t taken seriously enough.

Awww! Poor Bill! Nobody takes him seriously!

Then I read the article. You can too. Find it HERE.

After calling Lee his usual epithets of pimp and grifter (Lawdy! The projection is STRONG with this one!) Bill gets to the crux of the matter.

There it is. In black and white.

Bill Schmalfeldt is jealous of Lee Stranahan’s success. Jealous that Lee is actually a journalist, while Bill is not.

Poor poor baby. After all the times Bill’s proclaimed himself in lawsuits as being a respected jourminalist, it’s Lee who is actually written about in the national media. As a journalist.

Jealousy is such a bitch, ain’t it, Bill? Have fun chewing on it. For the rest of your life.

About The Dread Pirate Zombie

Member of the Zombie Horde and Lickspittle Minion. Out to eat your brainnnsssss. And a few other sweetbreads because they are so nomm-y. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
This entry was posted in Bill, Butthurt, Jourminalism, Laughing at Losers, PLM. Bookmark the permalink.

41 Responses to Jealousy is Such an Unbecoming Color

  1. Accipe remedium, Tremule! says:

    He actually contacted the Newsweek writer to bitch that his scurrilous claims about Stranahan didn’t make it into the piece – and got told to pound sand! Love it!

    Liked by 7 people

  2. 30+ years of investigative journalism…well. Minus the trucking years. And the DJ stuff, and so on.

    Liked by 8 people

    • See, that’s the thing. Most of us who have been in journalism list the time we actually were in journalism. For me, that would be 6 years. Newsroom clerk to reporter to Lifestyles Editor to City/Cops/Court/Page 2 Editor/Senior Reporter. Once I was no longer with the newspaper, I was *gasp* NO LONGER A JOURNALIST! Amazing how that works, eh?

      Liked by 3 people

  3. Paul Krendler says:


    Your tears of impotent rage are delicious. However, they would probably taste even sweeter is you could upgrade from Johnnie Walker Red to something a little more refined. Perhaps a nice Highland single malt like Glenmorangie.

    I know that will never happen, though, because PAUPER.

    Maybe you can save up and splurge when you win your first lawsuit! Or just start a GoFundMe campaign to buy you a decent bottle of Scotch. Cheaper than a scootypuff, and might last longer than your last one, too. (It was red! Vroom, VROOM!)

    Liked by 7 people

  4. lorddewclaw says:

    Awwwwww, whatsa matter, Brigadier General Butthurt? Having a case of the sadz because your “journalistic jenious” is ignored while Lee is in the White House press room asking questions and doing journalism stuff?

    It’s because you suck. At everything. Except sucking. You are an world class expert at that.

    You call Lee a grifter, and yet you have two (count them, TWO) blegs on GoFundMe grifting for cash, and tweeting posts asking for donations on Twitter. You call Lee a pimp, and yet I heard you telling the pink haired, fuggly Inflataskank on your podcast to show her boobs to the audience (yours are bigger, but flaccidly moobish and with less meth scabs). You call him a thief and yet who keeps stealing content of Team Free Speech to post on your immature and unfunny blogs and podcasts?

    Keep trying to hammer on Lee, Shitstain. Just makes you look even more pathetic.

    Liked by 10 people

  5. MJ says:

    Bill Schmalfeldt acts like the morality police, when, in fact:

    Bill has two divorces himself.
    Bill has bad credit.
    Bill has falsified documents, several for legal filings, and one to obtain a driver’s license
    Bill has had extra marital affairs and sexual relations with prostitutes, including a transexual in Japan.
    Bill has lied about his military service and has worn service ribbons for which he was not qualified.
    Bill wanted the NIH to help John Hoge’s wife, failed to use the same resources to save his own.
    Bill used a photo of his dead wife’s corpse as an extortion tool.
    Bill spent all the insurance money he received from his deceased wife, buying toys that eventually, he had to give up.
    Bill was evicted from the last two places he lived.
    Bill has been accused of rape and has never proven his innocence.
    Bill has little or no relationship with his children.
    Bill has lied about his medical diagnosis.

    There is a much larger list and many unanswered questions, but suffice it to say, whatever sins Bill believes are Lee Stranahan’s, Bill has a whole lot more.

    Liked by 8 people

    • popcornseller says:

      Let me just add:

      Bill is a TODDLERSTALKER!
      Bill is an alcoholic.
      Bill writes pron about cub scouts.
      Bill is a liar and faked Parkinson’s Disease.

      Liked by 6 people

    • Gus Bailey says:

      In fairness, MJ, the transsexual aspect is conjecture. Granted, I’m not aware of any repudiation. It was, however, before a live audience; purportedly.


      • JeffM says:

        Actually Woeful Willie did repudiate the transsexual aspect explicitly (at the artisanal blog if I remember correctly). I do not remember clearly the DETAILS of that repudiation, merely the fact. It may possibly have involved an assertion on his part that people were conflating an incident where he had sex with a female prostitute before a paying audience and some other incident involving him hitting on a Japanese transsexual.

        My problem with his repudiation is that I do not believe anything that he says unless it can be confirmed through reliable witnesses (blow-up dolls, sock-puppets, and convicted perjurers are not reliable.) Whether he was ever capable of having sex with a woman (his misogyny must come from somewhere), and whether he ever had sex before a paying audience with anything, whether mineral, vegetable, or animal, aardvarkian or human, male, female, or other, and whether the number of his sexual entanglements with transsexuals under any circumstances is none, one, or multiple are all issues on which his testimony is crucial. He himself admits to having such serious impairment of memory that he failed to remember receiving a document that he wrote about at length less than three months ago. Of course, his claim of that degree of memory loss may be untruthful. But whether it is his memory or his truthfulness that is weaker, I find Willie’s testimony worthless.


        • Gus Bailey says:

          Good points all. I guess it could have been a transsexual.

          Liked by 1 person

        • It is my understanding that there were two incidents that have been conflated into one. 1. Sex with a hooker in Japan on a revolving stage. 2. Kissing a woman who was really a man. Who may or may not have been a prostitute.

          The thing is, I would NEVER have known these things if Bill Schmalfeldt hadn’t put them out on the internet. I mean really. WTF. Overshare central there. Oy!

          Liked by 1 person

  6. Paul Krendler says:

    In which an obvious yet closeted homosexual, butthurt and bitterly envious never-was journimalist admits that he enjoys watching men fellate other men…

    …but thinks being called out for what he is, is somehow objectionable.

    Liked by 9 people

  7. This Other Latin F*cker says:

    Bill has always had this fantasy that he is some sort of important journalist. But he’s been fired from every job. He is the editor of a website only read by pedos and people keeping tabs on him for legal reasons. He can’t stand that fact that Lee has found the success that has eluded him for that past 40 years. Hell, he hates the fact that John Hoge can get more comments on Star Pron that Bill can get in six months of the dreck he shovels at his unread websites. He’s a jealous no talent loser.

    Liked by 7 people

    • I went looking for articles he authored at the various newspapers he claimed to been employed by, on his linkedin resume. Of those that actually existed (not the majority listed), only one had anything with his byline on it, that was ever archived online. Anyone care to guess whether that was an investigative report, or not? Who am I kidding? No guessing required, is there? Of course not, because no one has ever employed Bill Schmalfeldt as an investigative reporter. I’m unconvinced that he’s ever worked in any authorship role in print media, other than being the ‘funny’ anecdote guy at a glorified ‘penny saver’ circular.

      Liked by 2 people

  8. MJ says:

    Let’s all think of a song..

    I’ll start: “I fought the law” by the Bobby Fuller Four.

    Liked by 7 people

  9. John “Minemyown” Doe says:

    “I walk along the street of sorrow
    The Boulevard of Broken Dreams
    Where gigolo and gigolette
    Can take a kiss without regret
    So they forget their broken dreams.”

    “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” by Al Dubin (lyrics) and Harry Warren (music)

    Liked by 2 people

    • John “Minemyown” Doe says:

      Had to post the full song, it fits somebody to a t.

      Boulevard of Broken Dreams

      I walk along the street of sorrow
      The boulevard of broken dreams
      Where gigolo and gigolette
      Can take a kiss without regret
      So they forget their broken dreams

      You laugh tonight and cry tomorrow
      When you behold your shattered schemes
      Gigolo and gigolette
      Wake up to find their eyes are wet
      With tears that tell of broken dreams

      Here is where you’ll always find me
      Always walking up and down
      But I left my soul behind me
      In an old cathedral town

      The joy that you find here you borrow
      You cannot keep it long it seems
      Gigolo and gigolette
      Still sing a song and dance along
      The boulevard of broken dreams

      Here is where you’ll always find me
      Always walking up and down
      For I left my soul behind me
      In an old cathedral town

      The joy that you find here you borrow
      You cannot keep it long it seems
      But gigolo and gigolette
      Still sing a song and dance along
      The boulevard of broken dreams

      Liked by 2 people

  10. For Bill’s latest conquest :

    Liked by 9 people

  11. BusPassOffice says:

    I heard that military medals and journalist badges can b bought on the internets, or earned through a lifetime of achievement culminating in attending national press conferences as a member.

    Or u could retire, fake disabilities, get 9, 10, 11 restraining orders, be tried criminally, and now facing almost certain jail time

    Liked by 2 people

  12. gb420 says:

    It is absolutely comical to watch him try oh so desperately to inject himself in political conversations with real journalists and political figures. He does the political equivalent of stamping his feet saying “acknowledge me as a journalist, damnit” and their response is either to ignore him due to his irrelevancy or get a nice big GTFO.

    I gotta laugh every time.

    Liked by 3 people

  13. SPQR says:

    If we are doing songs ….

    Liked by 1 person

  14. The 13th Duke of Wymbourne says:

    Liked by 2 people

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