I’ve Already Read That

Defendant: Now, what Mrs. Palmer didn’t tell you is that on July 5th she posted what I consider a semi-hysterical post on her blog entitled “Schmalfeldt will not get my home address.” And then she basically runs down ah, her list of fears of me. “Schmalfeldt has promulgated that address to his network of slime-covered operatives who use information to stalk me and endanger my life and safety.” I don’t know any slime covered people. “Schmalfeldt continues to post pictures of places he says people live even when they don’t post where they live themselves, unlike Bill who telegraphs everywhere he lives.” The pictures are available on the internet. Ummmm, and then sheee engages in some type of hyperbole, “all while claiming he has a right to (all caps) ANSWERS (thunk on the desk) and ANSWERS (thunk) RIGHT NOW. Or ELSE (thunk) you will pay!” Ahhhh, “Schmalfeldt posted these pictures which are publicly available, true, and says he wants people’s neighbors to investigate these people so that they can find out what sort of person they are. As if salving Bill Schmalfeldt’s butthurt is the most important thing on the planet. Ever.” And then we jump down to paragraph two…

Judge: I’ve already read this sir..

Defendant: Oh, you’ve already read that already? Okay. So I responded via Twitter and told her I already have your home address. I don’t NEED your home address. The subpoena is on the way now. Simple question is…

Judge: I’ve already read that, sir.

Defendant: All right. She made no effort to explain the discrepancy so I was under the belief that she had, ahhh, misrepresented her home location when she filed the previous restraining order. Now. There was a post, ahhh, and I hope you’ll.. ah, ah, I’ll clean this up. In Dumb F Pretendy-land Twitterz..

Judge: I’ve already read that, sir.

Defendant: You’ve read that already? Ok

Judge: I’ve read this entire packet.

Defendant: Ahhh, Well, this is my packet, your honor. It’s not the same as hers. Aaahhhummm, so, I was wondering did she live in Reidsville North Carolina, when she filed her previous lawsuit, I’m sorry, not lawsuit, restraining order, claiming that this fat, disabled man with Parkinson’s Disease was going to travel somehow from Milwaukee to, ah, come and get her. It struck me as laughable. Oh, and, and her grandson as well. Ahh, she doesn’t tell you what I did to allegedly harass her grandson. I posted a picture online and I’ve never made a threat against her grandson and unless the baby was born with a congenitally blurred face…

Judge: I’ve read that…

Defendant: Oh, you’ve read that. So she took her job in Greensboro, which again raised questions, and she checked the box saying that she lived in Rockingham County on the date she signed it..

Judge: Okay, does that have anything to do, sir, with the complaint she filed against you?

Defendant: (frustrated) YES, I’m trying to contact her to find out whether or not she broke the law..

Judge: Does that have anything to do with anything that happened on or after July the 4th 2017.

Defendant: It has EVERYTHING to do. All I needed, your honor, was a simple yes or no answer, but instead she goes to her blog and inflames her readers into another round of hatred against me. A simple yes or no answer, your honor. That’s all I needed. I didn’t need her home address, I didn’t need her home phone number, I just wanted to make sure that she didn’t violate my civil rights by filing for a restraining order in a county where she did not live. Now, she has answered the question this morning. She says that she lived in Reidsville when she filed for her restraining order. I see no proof of that, but I’m not going to ask for any, because I’ve been told by the district attorney that no crime was committed. Now, unless Mrs. Palmer has any questions of me, or of the court, I WOULD like to ask her a few questions under oath.

Judge: Related to?

Defendant: Related to the emails…

Judge: No. Related only to her complaint.

Defendant: Related, yes that’s what I mean, your honor. You’ll have to excuse me. I get my words garbled sometimes. Ah, related to the current complaint.

Judge: Okay.

Defendant: And, we are both currently still under oath, right?

Judge: Yes.


About The Dread Pirate Zombie

Member of the Zombie Horde and Lickspittle Minion. Out to eat your brainnnsssss. And a few other sweetbreads because they are so nomm-y. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
This entry was posted in Bill, BOOM, No-Contact Order. Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to I’ve Already Read That

  1. theman9876 says:

    I’m not sure that he will ever understand the very basic aspects of our legal system. The Judge is explaining to him in open court exactly what the hearing is about and how to focus his questions accordingly. But he can’t seem to get past ‘the mean lady writing mean things about me’ on her website. He thinks that because Sarah mocks him on her website, it gives him the green light to stalk and harass her. He believes his reaction to her posts is justified because of the content in her posts. WRONG!!! The actions on one side of this equation are specifically protected by the Bill of Rights and the US Constitution. The other side of this equation is a crime in all 50 States punishable by fines and jail time.

    Liked by 10 people

  2. Rain says:

    He just doesn’t get it.
    and after receiving a double digit number of restraining orders, apparently he never will.

    Liked by 6 people

  3. John “Minemyown” Doe says:

    So this is what he did.

    Liked by 9 people

  4. tillycroaks says:

    Silly, Dumbfuck. No one is under any obligation to answer your questions. No matter what you “think” they’ve done to you. Being a Pro Se Prosecutor (cough) does not give you the power to compel an answer. Your actions are outrageous and harassing. There is no defense for the emails you sent, the twitter contacts or the phone calls and texts. You had no right to do that. And THAT, Dumbfuck, is the Crux of the Biscuit.

    Liked by 8 people

  5. Onlooker says:

    Oh,man. Wow.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Onlooker says:

    Also, boy is it clear that his whine about “a simple yes or no” (courtesy answer to one’s stalker) would not have been sufficient.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Onlooker says:

    Eh. Yes or no answer =insufficient, not the whine. There was whining enough.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Kyle Kiernan says:

    I love the tweets where he tries to mock wJJH for having x number of “hateful” comments.
    I can’t imagine the number of wives he would neglect to death to get half that many comments in his unread posts

    Liked by 8 people

  9. DeplorableRican says:

    Schmalfeldt has taken cluelessness and lack of insight to newer and greater levels that have ever been previously imagined (by us sane folks)

    Liked by 3 people

  10. I just love how he seems to think reading all those is helping his case when, in fact, all he is doing is confirming the allegations against him.

    You can’t fix stupid.

    Liked by 7 people

  11. gb420 says:

    The fat shitbag just doesn’t give up trying to get a “gotcha!” that a) he’ll never get and b) is completely irrelevant to what’s going on in this hearing, does he?

    Liked by 4 people

    • onlooker says:

      It’s especially delightful that it’s pretty plain there’s no gotcha to get, but he’s still sure he’s going to prove by geometric logic that it’s legal to bug someone who told you not to contact them, by contacting them repeatedly, if they won’t answer you.

      Liked by 3 people

  12. onlooker says:

    Well sit back and marvel a minute at how ridiculous his indignation is. MAH CIVIL RAHTS! WHich were compromised, how? How is it possible they were compromised? Forget that reality had nothing to do with the great crime scenario he imagined. Even if thus “deceived” he was not disadvantaged, suffered no injury, and the RO was lapsed; forget that IT IS NOT A CRIME to conceal one’s address, or give an alternate or even phony address, on these forms.

    He admits TO THE COURT IN THIS CASE that the only reason he didn’t show up to that restraining order is that he thought it ridiculous and unpossible that an RO could be granted.
    Not because hearings took place in the “wrong” county; he suffered no difference in the demands of compliance in any case
    He was so ready to be injured and outraged, but he cannot articulate how he could have been disadvantaged. And of course his fury at possibly being “lied” to is bizarre considering it is his favorite hobby.

    Liked by 8 people

  13. Eirik says:

    There is no way this would have been a yes or know answer. Any answer would have lead to a barrage of questions either accusing her of lying or committing a crime.

    Liked by 5 people

  14. Good lord, you are a fucking moron, Schmalfeldt. Don’t ever change.

    Liked by 3 people

  15. JeffM says:

    The alleged thought process here is breathtakingly incompetent.

    Willy’s only hope of an argument was that he believed himself to be under a legal obligation to give Ash’s correct address to the court in South Carolina. “I didn’t need her home address” nails the coffin shut on that. No legal purpose. He was right to default on so many restraining orders: he does worse when he shows up to defend himself.

    Liked by 4 people

  16. gb420 says:

    Fakinsons: I WOULD like to ask her a few questions under oath.

    Judge: Related to?

    Fakinsons: Related to the emails…

    Judge: No. Related only to her complaint.

    Fakinsons: Related, yes that’s what I mean, your honor. You’ll have to excuse me. I get my words garbled sometimes. Ah, related to the current complaint.

    Judge: Okay.

    Fakinsons: And, we are both currently still under oath, right?

    Judge: Yes.

    I bet the very next thing out of fakinsons mouth was a question about the emails and had nothing to do with the complaint.

    I’d put my Ducati on it.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. sam says:

    I can almost imagine the stone face on the judge when Bill tries out the “congenitally blurred” line.

    MJ or Dave, can’t remember which, smart men both, posted a video of how Bill IMAGINES a court case will go, with him skillfully dismantling the witness until Sarah bursts into tears like at the end of Perry Mason episode. “Yes! Yes! I did it! Just stop! Stop your relentless logic, against which I am but a trembling woman!”

    “Congenitally blurred”. He thought that one over, rolled it in his mind. It was going to be a big laugh getter. The court would be bowled over by his cleverness. And the judge shut him down. Crickets could be heard.

    Can you IMAGINE the bus ride back home?

    “I’m a pretty charming fellow” Bill once claimed, as a reason to fear facing him in court. Bill really thinks he could h=get a jury of twelve to take up his righteous cause against those who vex him.

    More likely it would get us 12 new blogs devoted to mocking Bill Schmalfeldt.

    Liked by 3 people

  18. onlooker says:

    He still thinks its ok to show family pictures to get under the skin of his targets. LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO.

    He thought the judge would be won to his side and persuaded of his benevolent cause if he made fun of someone’s grandkid in court. He doesn’t seem to understand that this might tend to support a normal person’s desire to avoid contact with his creepy and hostile messaging.

    He’s a perennial fourth grader, only with a debit card and the ability to drive ( and hold up a rifle with his finger on the trigger, per one self-published portrait) I think he might have broken John’s front door. He fantasizes about wacking people in print and visual media, So


  19. Pingback: If/Then Statements | BILLY SEZ – Adventures in Bill Schmalfeldt's Pretendy Land Internet Courtroom. All Rise!

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