This blog is dedicated to an incredible man. A singular man (thank God! don’t think we can handle any more of him!) with a special set of skills: William (Bill) Schmalfeldt.
If you know Bill Schmalfeldt, or about him, you probably won’t be surprised by anything you find here. The blog is about three-quarters words and images (some of the latter prettied up a bit) that Bill has seen fit to put out there on the Internet over more than a decade. The Billy Sez staff (we do this so you don’t have to, thank you very much) adds some commentary here and there as we see fit (think MST3K). If you don’t know Bill Schmalfeldt and have just somehow managed to arrive here unbidden: Welcome! As you become acquainted with Bill through this website you may at first pity him and feel he is being unfairly mocked. Our suggestion is that you read every comment carefully and, by the time you are done, see if you still feel that way.
You see, many right-minded folks think Bill Schmalfeldt has some problems. A problem of not remembering what he says, or claiming that he doesn’t. A problem of making on an ongoing basis what are plainly threats to various people, all while hiding behind a “poor, poor pitiful me- I have Parkinson’s Disease and wouldn’t hurt a fly” persona. A problem of constantly accusing people online who choose to be anonymous of being various real life persons and getting it wrong, often after publishing derogatory or embarrassing personal information about his innocent target. A problem of saying that you are an awful, no-good dirty person for repeating and republishing things he said in the first place. Because in Bill’s mind he has a stellar reputation and you, peasant, do not! And he’ll tell you so while he calls you various foul and filthy names and makes scatological references in your regard that cannot be repeated in polite company. Just thank our stars and garters that we are most definitely NOT polite company!
And if you are Bill Schmalfeldt and are here, have FUN. Just have FUN, Bill. And don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
We owe credit for the idea behind this blog to the magnificent Stacy McCain, who captured the essence of Bill Schmalfeldt and gave us our inspiration when he said, “The best way to discredit Bill Schmalfeldt is to quote Bill Schmalfeldt.”
We dedicate this blog though, as we have noted, to the incredible Bill Schmalfeldt. After all that, you might ask why we find him incredible?
So in the end, Dear Reader, only you can make up your own mind about Bill Schmalfeldt. We hope that you will use Billy Sez by letting his own words be your guide. And keep in mind that we have screenshots and archived proof to back EVERYTHING up.
The Fine Print: Any image you see on Billy Sez is yours to download, copy and repost as you see fit. The only restriction we place on their use is that they may not be used in any communication that would be intended or deemed to go directly to Bill Schmalfeldt, such as in a Twitter post that includes his current handle, a post on his current blog, or an email sent to him at a current email address for him. If you do send him a Billy Sez image or other content directly, you are on your own. We are not trying to hide from Bill, mind you. We just want to make sure that the content we post here on Billy Sez is seen by him based on his own purposeful effort to get here or elsewhere where it appears.
Another thing we recommend you do while you are here is click on the images. Because they are each tagged with various items of information, doing this will somehow (don’t ask us!) send to Google Image Search a little message that says “I like this and I want it to be discoverable by everyone.” We have already had our first “Billy Sez” image make it to the top page of Google Image Search and we hope to see many, many more. Thank you!